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I saw this on a bumper sticker today.
I immediately chuckled by how ridiculous I found this to be and how it could even be offensive to some. I thought, well if birth means you matter then death must mean that you dont. How awful this sentence must make a couple feel that has lost their child to a miscarriage or childhood illness. Your child mattered…well almost. And with pregnancies having a 40-50% miscarriage rate, most people must not mean that much to God. Maybe this sticker makes more sense then I thought.
Well I researched the quote and the internet informs me that it from an essay by Rabbi Simon Jacobson. He writes:
“This means you are absolutely necessary. You are indispensable to God’s vision of the world, chosen to fulfill a mission in this world that you and only you can accomplish. Like musical notes in the grand Divine composition, each of us has our unique music to play.
This is really sad and fluffy. Fairy tale reasoning to give people comfort when they feel like their life has no purpose. Essentially one of the main reasoning in the whole of religion. Tho odd thing about this is that for me, the exact OPPOSITE it is true. I am not absolutely necessary and neither is anyone else. Take motivation from the fact that if you do not do well in your endeavors and social relationships, you will fail at them. No one has that planned out for you. There will be someone else who works harder than you that will get your job or your girlfriend if you are lazy or unkind. Take comfort in knowing that everyone is dispensable and you don’t need to deal with mean coworkers, abusive spouses, noisy coworkers, or any unhealthy relationship if you do not want to. There is no mission. There is no “grand Divine composition.” It is up to you write the music of your own life. There are plenty of highs and plenty of holes to fall into too and this has nothing to do with any plans a creator had for you. I’ve found that there are somethings that will come up and surprise you, things you didn’t ask for, finding money or a car crash. Take the bad ones with your knees locked and a stiff chin. There is no point in trying to find reason in things that have none. Quote me on that. That will be my bumper sticker.
Most things in life are not so mysterious, they are a very intricate system of cause and effect and its not always easy to see it right away. I notice that often when people are stricken with grief or misfortune, they tend to be blinded with shock. Thinking “I don’t know how this could happen.” Ask any psychologist or investigator, if you look hard enough and sometimes you don’t have to even do that, there are clues and events leading up to circumstances you never dreamed you would find yourself in. It’s important to be keen. Continue to grow and keep yourself educated and informed. Love and share your life honestly and bravely. Don’t be afraid to take chances but prepare yourself for lose because its a given.
“Do you realize” by the Flaming Lips is a good song to play right about now. If you can film yourself dancing to it and want to send it to me, well that would just be too fantastic.
